In my job as a Transformational Life Coach, I find the norm for most is to be afraid of the future and constantly living in the past causing much stress and anxiety. The mind is busy and habits are formed to restrict the mind to only past and future thinking.
Constantly living in the future is for many, a belief of being in control. Somewhere that control was lost, usually due to a traumatic experience. When this occurs, all you feel you have control is your future, so you grip so tight with both hands for the fear of loss of the one thing you feel you can control. This however keeps you in fear of the future and that you will have the same bad experiences again.
There are also those who fear the future and the uncertainty of what could happen and what’s to come. No one knows your future, but you have instincts that guide you. You also have your past lessons to learn from so that you don’t do them again.
Living in the past is fear-based. Fear of experiencing the same thing again. Constant thinking and worrying that you will forget the lesson. If you give up the story you will lose the lesson which will also no longer mean you are a victim.
All the above results in more negative than positive thinking. The problem with future thinking is that we imagine all the bad things from the past coming to haunt us in the future. Past thinking creates fears of the future. It becomes a vicious circle as you switch your thinking from one to the other. Where does it end?
It can only end with you and your thinking. The incessant stream of thinking is unnecessary. The past is gone and you cannot change it. It may help to keep a diary of your lessons so you don’t forget them. Quite honestly, I don’t believe you will forget the lessons if they were that significant to you.
Through consistent projecting yourself into the past and future, you miss out on the now. This is the most natural place to be present in – right now.
When you are not present in the now you are missing special moments such as:
- your children taking their first step or saying their first word
- your partner and their good qualities
- holidays that you spend a lot of time and money on and miss the enjoyment of the surroundings, the beauty, the culture. You don’t take everything in that you go to experience;
- you eat and don’t really enjoy the flavors of your food nor appreciate it enough in the moment;
- the opportunities that the world shows us
- nature – as a butterfly lands on a flower, not appreciating the colors and missing the sunsets or sunrises.
Letting go of the past and future to stay present can be hard to do alone. It is also unnecessary when I am here as an experienced Transformation Life Coach to help you through the tough moments in order to be more present. Call me today to experience how the proven techniques guide you out of incessant thinking of past and future so you can live a happier and more peaceful present moment.